Stress and fatigue

Feel like a flower in a storm? You're not alone.

A vocal coach of mine from the upper-echelon of performing artists told me a long time ago that a big career is an ordeal. At the time I was much younger than I am now and I couldn't quite understand what he meant. Now I do. To be honest, I wouldn't be able to pretend that I have had a "big" career as a classical singer. I have chosen a long career over a big career, and I have heard and been a part of some absolutely great productions.

On the other hand, as a teacher and massage practitioner (as well as my career in opera management...that's another story) I have seen what stress and fatigue can do to a person. Like a flower in a storm. That's the paradox: the singer's life is one of protecting that flower, the fresh and healthy sound full of sunlight and flexibility while the winds of life whip around you. Living in the world of travel, performance pressure, not to mention the parts of the business that we don't talk about: managing egos (colleagues as well as our own) and being willing to stand up for yourself when people in the business do things that are dishonest and frankly sadistic. I have stories from the world of opera administration that would shock you.

Stress and fatigue are often two sides of the same coin. Physical and emotional resilience make stress much easier to handle, and being well-rested is key. But when we get pulled into the downward spiral of stress and fatigue, those two demons can work together to make things worse. How do we interrupt that downward spiral? A few common sense ideas:

• Make your daily routine non-negotiable

• Take care of your mental health

• Make joy a part of your daily diet

• Take care of your body

• Build a great team

The wind can blow from all different directions, but we have the capacity to keep our roots intact by starting with a good daily routine that will hit the checkpoints: body, mind, and spirit. This can be meditation, journaling, yoga, walking, stretching, waking up and saying "wow, thank you for another day of life!". The daily routine is non-negotiable, and if you need help structuring it, let me know. I have lived by my routine for years and years.

Taking care of your mental health is so central, and this can mean different things for different people, and at different times in our lives. Therapy is great. I wish I had started earlier, but then again, there are always new ways of understanding yourself. Being part of a spiritual community works for many of us and for those of us who live geographically far away from where we started, connecting with a mosque, synagogue, or church can keep us in touch with some of our earliest foundations. Having in your bag a metaphorical piece of soil from your homeland can be a life-saver when the wind starts to blow. Mine is the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius.

Making joy a part of your daily diet makes a huge difference how you tell your personal history. I need to be reminded often that things could be worse, and even when things go wrong, there is almost always a silver lining. Look for that silver lining and it will change the story that we tell ourselves about ourselves. As performers we are to be joy-machines. I think it was Eugene Lehner who talked about musicians/performers being the beautiful flowers of humanity. This from a man who had lived through the turbulent mid-20th Century in Hungary before emigrating to the US. It is easier to give joy to others when we cultivate it in ourselves.

Ok, here is the commercial part of this message: take care of your body. Obviously, right? Massage works. Your body records everything, and massage can help you rewind the tape and empty the trash from your harddrive. No matter how well physically trained you are, your training is a part of how you protect yourself, which is a part of your fear-body. To get past that fear-body barrier, we need the touch and cultivated awarenesses of others. That's where I come in as your massage practitioner. Like talk therapy, massage is a major time-saving practice. You will get farther faster.

Build a great team. No one succees in this business of performing (or life for that matter) by ourselves. We just don't. Yes, ultimately it is you who stand alone on the stage of life, but you didn't get there by yourself. Having a great team on your side is key: teachers, coaches, sane and humane agents (!!), bodyworkers, therapists. AND, you will learn things that will allow you to be on the great team of someone else, and in giving back what we have been granted you complete the divine circle of human connection.

Stress and fatigue, two sides of the same coin. Interrupt the cycle and you will bloom even when the winds are whipping all around. Let me know how I can be a part of your great team. PK